As you can tell from the last post I am a bit behind on my posting, i am writing them at work but not managing to type them up. Mostly because I have been ill, with flu, properly ill, i hallucinated with fever for most of the weekend. if mum hadnt been there to get me into bed on saturday i'm not sure what would have happened to me.
That combined with revising for an exam and having an unexpected job interview yesterday has left me a little short of time, to be honest my few spare moments have had to be taken over with sleep in order to cope.
But on a really really exciting note i have anew job - a 3 month temporary contract working as a research assistant - w00t just what i want to be doing with my life, so a step in the right direction indeed - i will tell you more about it when i have started on monday
I know this means my saga of call centreness is over before it has really started but i hope you can forgive me on this, the people who i have introduced already are bound to keep featuring in my life so it wasnt a complete waste!!
Right this sick sparkly fairy needs yet more sleep, will catch up with the blogging soon i promise!!!
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Thoughts from Sunday
Note to self: self do not try to set up a wireless network when it has gone midnight and you're really ill, this sort of situation is not conducive to anything going right, least of all anything to do with technology.
Oh and dont forget that apple support line workers are clueless!
p.s Bosch and Oli might have a point (and yes that did hurt to admit that - hope you dont read it) flapping gets you nowhere, especially with technology!!!
Oh and dont forget that apple support line workers are clueless!
p.s Bosch and Oli might have a point (and yes that did hurt to admit that - hope you dont read it) flapping gets you nowhere, especially with technology!!!
Saturday, January 19, 2008
The BBC
As I am sure I have mentioned before I love to check out the BBC news website, not only for the days events but for the more random stories that my attention is often drawn to (for true randomness check out the also in the news section).
Today my eye has been caught, and my heart and imagination captured, by the stories of two men, seperated by hundreds of years. One a medieval knight and the other a WW2 veteran. Both are heroes in their own right, and both have inspired awe and respect in their contemporaries as well as those of us who follow on in time and would love to follow in their footsteps.
Whilst it is important to acknowledge the heroes of our current age, it is also important to remember these by gone heroes for inspiration and to remind ourselves how times have changed.
Which is your hero? Whilst I do favour one above the other I will admit (can you guess who?) my mum kicks both their asses in the hero stakes. Sorry guys.
Procrastinating student over and out
Today my eye has been caught, and my heart and imagination captured, by the stories of two men, seperated by hundreds of years. One a medieval knight and the other a WW2 veteran. Both are heroes in their own right, and both have inspired awe and respect in their contemporaries as well as those of us who follow on in time and would love to follow in their footsteps.
Whilst it is important to acknowledge the heroes of our current age, it is also important to remember these by gone heroes for inspiration and to remind ourselves how times have changed.
Which is your hero? Whilst I do favour one above the other I will admit (can you guess who?) my mum kicks both their asses in the hero stakes. Sorry guys.
Procrastinating student over and out
The increasing madness
There is a psy party in pompey tonight. There wont be another one down here till march and I shant have time to go to London for one till at least feb cos of coursework. Problem is my friends are either interested but cant come or arent interested and therefore wont come.
Sooooo I think i'll go on my own, rather scary i'm not gonna lie, but at least its a positive sign that I feel able to give it a try. Ultimately (and with much discussion) I think I will regret not trying more than I would regret trying and it not being any good. So I'm gonna give it a go, wish me luck!
Sooooo I think i'll go on my own, rather scary i'm not gonna lie, but at least its a positive sign that I feel able to give it a try. Ultimately (and with much discussion) I think I will regret not trying more than I would regret trying and it not being any good. So I'm gonna give it a go, wish me luck!
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Thoughts of a Call Girl
Hehe bet that got your attention didn't it?
I have a job at a call centre atm, hence the title, it's not great but hey it pays the mortgage and gives me the flexibility to do my masters degree. Essentially though I cant escape that I have basically sold my soul to TLC.
But it does give you the advantage of a great deal of freedom mentally as, if we are going to be honest here, its hardly the most stimulating of jobs. This also results in some of the most random conversations that i have ever had (and speaking as a member of the flock this is quite a statement in itself as i am sure they can verify). So i feel that these combined features will result in a series of blog posts about my working life.
So I thought i would use this post to introduce the main characters who feature in my working day:
MissC - I don't even know where to start here really, so maybe not the best first choice! - a unique, quirky amazing dress sense, kinda hippy meets boho i guess, a very talented artist as you can see in the photo of the mural on my sitting room wall:
A caring friend who has been great to have around even though we still don't know each other that well and amazingly scatty, coming out with some of the silliest and naive things I have ever heard, mostly a result of her young years (so hopefully some good quotes to put on here soon)
Lady J - elegant, ladylike, my sensible side magnified and personified. In fact very much how I could have been if I was a)more sensible (that doesn't make her very sensible just more so than me) b)hadn't had my horizons so dramatically broadened and brain broken by the flock and c)the corruption hadn't been completed in other ways by my blonde haired English boy.
Also very clever, she is law major, and kind of gives me hope as it means I am not the only graduate to be stuck in a job like this!
Wonderboy (ok so I'm listening to tenacious D right now i confess) - I don't know where to even begin describing him - he's amazing. Mad, hyper active, a love of fashion that is only exceeded by his love of music, an amazing sense of quirkiness and a love of outrageous colours (and no, in case you're wondering, he's not gay). A very talented lyricist also. Our conversations are repeatedly punctuated by explosions of passion about something or one of us disappearing from it to write an idea down. A real find.
Sianykins - not really a nickname as she as already been mentioned in the blog. Again a version of myself, in this case frighteningly like me when I was her age (19). Absolutely mental, giggle fits galore are had when I'm around her, loving, caring, very cuddly, cares about things and people almost to a fault. A real lifer of a friend (i hope).
Obviously these aren't all the people I work with, but they are the people who's company I spend the most time in, who I enjoy spending time with and who have made an impact on my life somehow, whether its in attitude, life consideration, clothing advice or simply helping me feel I am not alone in going through what I am, and of course providing me with some real big good ol' belly laughs.
I have a job at a call centre atm, hence the title, it's not great but hey it pays the mortgage and gives me the flexibility to do my masters degree. Essentially though I cant escape that I have basically sold my soul to TLC.
But it does give you the advantage of a great deal of freedom mentally as, if we are going to be honest here, its hardly the most stimulating of jobs. This also results in some of the most random conversations that i have ever had (and speaking as a member of the flock this is quite a statement in itself as i am sure they can verify). So i feel that these combined features will result in a series of blog posts about my working life.
So I thought i would use this post to introduce the main characters who feature in my working day:
MissC - I don't even know where to start here really, so maybe not the best first choice! - a unique, quirky amazing dress sense, kinda hippy meets boho i guess, a very talented artist as you can see in the photo of the mural on my sitting room wall:
A caring friend who has been great to have around even though we still don't know each other that well and amazingly scatty, coming out with some of the silliest and naive things I have ever heard, mostly a result of her young years (so hopefully some good quotes to put on here soon)
Lady J - elegant, ladylike, my sensible side magnified and personified. In fact very much how I could have been if I was a)more sensible (that doesn't make her very sensible just more so than me) b)hadn't had my horizons so dramatically broadened and brain broken by the flock and c)the corruption hadn't been completed in other ways by my blonde haired English boy.
Also very clever, she is law major, and kind of gives me hope as it means I am not the only graduate to be stuck in a job like this!
Wonderboy (ok so I'm listening to tenacious D right now i confess) - I don't know where to even begin describing him - he's amazing. Mad, hyper active, a love of fashion that is only exceeded by his love of music, an amazing sense of quirkiness and a love of outrageous colours (and no, in case you're wondering, he's not gay). A very talented lyricist also. Our conversations are repeatedly punctuated by explosions of passion about something or one of us disappearing from it to write an idea down. A real find.
Sianykins - not really a nickname as she as already been mentioned in the blog. Again a version of myself, in this case frighteningly like me when I was her age (19). Absolutely mental, giggle fits galore are had when I'm around her, loving, caring, very cuddly, cares about things and people almost to a fault. A real lifer of a friend (i hope).
Obviously these aren't all the people I work with, but they are the people who's company I spend the most time in, who I enjoy spending time with and who have made an impact on my life somehow, whether its in attitude, life consideration, clothing advice or simply helping me feel I am not alone in going through what I am, and of course providing me with some real big good ol' belly laughs.
Friday, January 11, 2008
nearly the weekend
bouncy bouncy bouncy happy sparkly fairy
its nearly the weekend, my friend Graeme who I havent seen for three years is here (and we were up till 4am gossiping and laughing ourselves silly (stifling yawn of tiredness) and tomorrow i am going to two house parties and will be seeing friends i havent seen for time periods ranging from weeks to years
should have a lot to write about on mon :)
have fun, loves to you all
its nearly the weekend, my friend Graeme who I havent seen for three years is here (and we were up till 4am gossiping and laughing ourselves silly (stifling yawn of tiredness) and tomorrow i am going to two house parties and will be seeing friends i havent seen for time periods ranging from weeks to years
should have a lot to write about on mon :)
have fun, loves to you all
Sunday, January 6, 2008
Saturday, January 5, 2008
argh cant break the addiction
see what i mean - i start and i can't stop
Just noticed that I am back on the list of the redeemed who post often!! (if you dont know what I am talking about check out the link to the Pontifex Niger) as i remember it the criteria to make it back onto the list is that your post has to make interesting reading - quite a complement then!
yay right now back to work before sleepover time (that really does make me sounds about 5 doesnt it? lol)
Just noticed that I am back on the list of the redeemed who post often!! (if you dont know what I am talking about check out the link to the Pontifex Niger) as i remember it the criteria to make it back onto the list is that your post has to make interesting reading - quite a complement then!
yay right now back to work before sleepover time (that really does make me sounds about 5 doesnt it? lol)
todays ramble
uh-oh its happened again, I start the whole posting thing off again, and even though technically I dont have time to do so, I dont seem to be able to stop posting. This could become a problem!
Hmm so mainly I have come here today to tell you of things that have made my day happy:
1 - I was wondering down some of the streets in Pompey that are away from the main shopping centres, and spent the morning blissfully happy walking in and out of hippy and goth shops, when I came across a proper old school hippy shop filled with all sorts of smoking parafinalia, poi and fire sticks etc, awesome in itself obviously, but not only that but the owner refuses to play anything but old school psytrance, knows the organisers of the psytrances raves down here (and used to be one) and is a visual DJ :D happy sparkly fairy indeed
2 - I spend some of my Christmas money - its taking a while to do - the house is leaving me so broke that to have some money to spend on myself is a rare event so i want to make sure i buy things that i really love, want and need
and 3 - i may have shown some of you a website that I am very much in love with atm called kinky-angel- well it turns out that the only store associated with this website is actually in pompey and is just down the road from me - w00t!
and to finish of my day of happiness, I shall be going to my friend Sians tonight for a silly fun sleepover night, and i get to wear my new fleecy, giant pjs that are covered in pandas!! lol yay
happy happy days indeed
loves to you all
Hmm so mainly I have come here today to tell you of things that have made my day happy:
1 - I was wondering down some of the streets in Pompey that are away from the main shopping centres, and spent the morning blissfully happy walking in and out of hippy and goth shops, when I came across a proper old school hippy shop filled with all sorts of smoking parafinalia, poi and fire sticks etc, awesome in itself obviously, but not only that but the owner refuses to play anything but old school psytrance, knows the organisers of the psytrances raves down here (and used to be one) and is a visual DJ :D happy sparkly fairy indeed
2 - I spend some of my Christmas money - its taking a while to do - the house is leaving me so broke that to have some money to spend on myself is a rare event so i want to make sure i buy things that i really love, want and need
and 3 - i may have shown some of you a website that I am very much in love with atm called kinky-angel- well it turns out that the only store associated with this website is actually in pompey and is just down the road from me - w00t!
and to finish of my day of happiness, I shall be going to my friend Sians tonight for a silly fun sleepover night, and i get to wear my new fleecy, giant pjs that are covered in pandas!! lol yay
happy happy days indeed
loves to you all
Friday, January 4, 2008
Hello 2008 - a real fresh start!
Right so lets get this whole restarting the blog thing to a positive start, it can be easy when bogged under to allow yourself to get morbid and start a viciously spiraling downward cycle
But this is a new year, so lets get back to the old school Katie who is showing many signs of improvements on her old self (an increased amount of relaxation/peace, and a developing and an evolving love of psytrance and associated raves being two of them)
For one, learning how to let go completely. And this hard lesson was finally learnt to a whole new level on new years eve, and it was the most amazing night out I have ever had in my life as well – so all in all a good start
I went to a psytrance rave in London, with Oli and his housemates and few other of their friends, and arrrgh it was soooooooooo cool. I had the most amazing hallucinations ever – not something I have managed before or would have coped with without panicking, but I realized all I had to do was truly relax into it and had the most amazing half hour or so (have no real idea of time so this is a guess) and I came out realizing that not only was I capable of that, but all the stress and angst that I have let myself build up was not necessary and that it never will be, and ultimately I will get there.
That and I was overwhelmed by the awesomeness at having lived in a cartoon for that whole time
And then all the philosophical bullshit stopped and I stomped myself stupid and loved every god damn minute of it with my favourite blond hair, blue eyed English boy at my side (or me at his side, depending on how you want to look at it!) along with people whose company I thoroughly enjoy appearing and disappearing at various intervals! Which just made my night completely perfect
I can’t say this lesson has truly stuck yet, I have glitches where I feel true fear at everything, but there is an underlying sense of calm and belief that I think is here to stay
So how else have I changed this year? I have moved countries, taken on two jobs and carried on with my masters degree and bought a house– and I could never have managed this without the support of my friends and family who have helped me to the best of their ability, and cared for me the whole way, even if I cant always see it, I only hope I can find a way to show how much I appreciate them for this
My aims for this hope filled New Year:
- Be kinder to myself – yes I can be super woman, but I don’t always have to be
- To spend even more time with my friends when I can, but to remember that they are always there and this masters degree will finish soon so sometimes that has to take priority!
- To go raving more, I enjoyed it before, and I have now realized that I absolutely love it – I only hope the only people who I know that go to the psytrance raves will let me keep joining them, otherwise damn it I don’t know what will happen on that front argh
- To allow myself just to sit back and smell the roses
- And stop worrying – ultimately everything will all work out as it is supposed to
The only morose thing I have to say is that I wish I'd had this important lesson about letting go before I hurt one of the people that I care about most in this world. I should have just talked, but I was too frightened and silly, so I didn’t, and I hurt them. I just hope that time can heal things, and I hope I haven’t lost all the care and trust they gave me; I value it more than anything in this world. All I can say is that I won't make that mistake again - I can’t. So, now to try and activate my final resolve for the year listed above!!! lol
But all in all, I think this has a great deal of potential to be a very good year. So happy New Year to you all!!!
But this is a new year, so lets get back to the old school Katie who is showing many signs of improvements on her old self (an increased amount of relaxation/peace, and a developing and an evolving love of psytrance and associated raves being two of them)
For one, learning how to let go completely. And this hard lesson was finally learnt to a whole new level on new years eve, and it was the most amazing night out I have ever had in my life as well – so all in all a good start
I went to a psytrance rave in London, with Oli and his housemates and few other of their friends, and arrrgh it was soooooooooo cool. I had the most amazing hallucinations ever – not something I have managed before or would have coped with without panicking, but I realized all I had to do was truly relax into it and had the most amazing half hour or so (have no real idea of time so this is a guess) and I came out realizing that not only was I capable of that, but all the stress and angst that I have let myself build up was not necessary and that it never will be, and ultimately I will get there.
That and I was overwhelmed by the awesomeness at having lived in a cartoon for that whole time
And then all the philosophical bullshit stopped and I stomped myself stupid and loved every god damn minute of it with my favourite blond hair, blue eyed English boy at my side (or me at his side, depending on how you want to look at it!) along with people whose company I thoroughly enjoy appearing and disappearing at various intervals! Which just made my night completely perfect
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I can’t say this lesson has truly stuck yet, I have glitches where I feel true fear at everything, but there is an underlying sense of calm and belief that I think is here to stay
So how else have I changed this year? I have moved countries, taken on two jobs and carried on with my masters degree and bought a house– and I could never have managed this without the support of my friends and family who have helped me to the best of their ability, and cared for me the whole way, even if I cant always see it, I only hope I can find a way to show how much I appreciate them for this
My aims for this hope filled New Year:
- Be kinder to myself – yes I can be super woman, but I don’t always have to be
- To spend even more time with my friends when I can, but to remember that they are always there and this masters degree will finish soon so sometimes that has to take priority!
- To go raving more, I enjoyed it before, and I have now realized that I absolutely love it – I only hope the only people who I know that go to the psytrance raves will let me keep joining them, otherwise damn it I don’t know what will happen on that front argh
- To allow myself just to sit back and smell the roses
- And stop worrying – ultimately everything will all work out as it is supposed to
The only morose thing I have to say is that I wish I'd had this important lesson about letting go before I hurt one of the people that I care about most in this world. I should have just talked, but I was too frightened and silly, so I didn’t, and I hurt them. I just hope that time can heal things, and I hope I haven’t lost all the care and trust they gave me; I value it more than anything in this world. All I can say is that I won't make that mistake again - I can’t. So, now to try and activate my final resolve for the year listed above!!! lol
But all in all, I think this has a great deal of potential to be a very good year. So happy New Year to you all!!!
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